The title of this is kinda weird but what I mean by getting through the middle is me trying to describe the place I am in right now. A little update on what I’ve been doing, graduated bible college in June, I literally just offically finished dental assisting school last week. I’m now a dental assistant and just today I was signed up for my RDA state test which after I pass that I will be a registered dental assistant in the state of CA. I’m still working at chick-fil-a because I actually really enjoy it there and I’m still enrolled in Miramar College classes(I may say struggling to get all my prerequisites for hygiene school done.) I am not struggling in school because lack of knowledege but LACK of MOTIVATION. Adult life is hitting me in the face and my easy-going, go with the flow lifestyle is taking the punches. Realizing I’ve been so fortunate in life but now needing to grow up and take responsibility for things is… not fun.
The thing is, I have so many dreams and goals and expectations of myself and for my future but the fact that nothing is fluorishing before my eyes right now is very discouraging. I have been letting circumstances and facts get me down. I’m calling the time of my life that I am in right now “the middle” because I’m not doing anything specifically that I love or that I feeeeel is important. Basically I’ve been doing the whole 9-5 work thing then when I’m not doing that I am at school or at church. Recently I’ve found myself going through the motions so to speak. Don’t get me wrong I know in the depths of who I am that I have a purpose on this planet but I feel like… how could I be possibly living that purpose out right now? In this place in life where I feel so random? Is this my purpose or am I off track? Do I just need to be more patient? If you couldn’t tell I have lots of questions. I’m 18 years old with dreams to help impact the people in the world but yet I’m at work and school everyday.. I know that I am so fortunate to even be able to go to school and work but for me it has just been so dicouraging. I don’t want to feel useless and I don’t want to be useless because I know I have a plan to fufill on this earth.
Something that I noticed is I do a lot of thinking and questioning and debating but the whole time I’ve been writing this post this scripture kept popping in my head. “For as the heavens are higher than the earth, So are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:9 This scripture gives me so much peace in my heart because I know that even when my mind is racing, My God is still at peace and He is still on the throne, never changing.
That is what desire to become everyday. The enemy wants me to think the way I’ve been thinking. He wants me to question my purpose and calling and he is trying to push me until I will stop pursuing the plans God has for me and the goals I have for myself
But I will not be shaken in Jesus name.
I’m giving myself three things to do:
Put the Word first, always.
33 ” But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” This scripture is enough to support my first point.
Don’t put too much on your plate
I was trying to work 40 hours each week at my internship, work part-time at chick-fil-a, go to school part-time, have time for Jesus, and not die?? It was not fun but also unproductive as ironic as that sounds. But I mean unproductive for my spirit, even though it seems like I was getting lots of things done in my flesh. I’m learning to cut down. I don’t think getting things done fast is worth the mental breakdowns I had each week. Even if I have to take more time to finish certain projects or accomplish certain things, taking the time is worth it.
Be great at whatever you’re doing
Just going through the motions, getting through things instead of trying, it’s so unsatisfying to me. Being average and not putting in a lot of effort won’t get me very far. I’m learning, even though I’m busy with school and work, to try my best even when I really really don’t want to. Might as well right? I’m spending my time as these places anyways, so why don’t I make it productive? It has paid off in work and I know this is going to be crucial in life. Instead of complaining about the place I am in, I am going to be great wherever I am put in life. 23″And whatever you do, do it hearily, as to the Lord and not to men, 24 knowing that from the Lord you will receieve the reward of the inheritance; for you serve the Lord Christ.” Colossians 3:23-24
One last thing I want to do is start posting more, I want to make time for my blog because it’s something I enjoy doing very much. Thank you if you made it all the way to the end here, I love you. Stay tuned! I will be writing again soon.